I've found it!

I've found it! I've found myself! Five months of living here and I'm happy now. It was a tough five months. Part of me was still in Tampa because I had the assanine idea to get involved with someone before I left. We gave it our best efforts, texting, messaging, sending naughty pics, talking about his plans of moving to NY but in the end, it didn't work out. I realized that I was so consumed on our future plans I wasn't living and enjoying the present. My thoughts were always on him and wondering when I would hear from him again. I think we both put in a lot of effort and we both exausted ourselves too. Now it feels like life is going 100%.
I've made lots of new friends, am hanging out with a guy that I'm wildly attracted too and life is finally moving forward....because I'm living in the present.

Five months

Today, March 4th, marks five montns that I've been living in NY. I think as long as I'm in this city, the 4th of every month will have some meaning for me....at least for a while!
I've hung out some really cool guys here in the past couple of weeks. Some of which I would seriously consider dating. I've decided not to move out of my current apartment that I share with my roommate.
I had a realization that for me to truly embrace my life here, I had to let go of some people in FL;specifically the guy that I really liked that is still living in FL and has plans to move up here one day. It hurts a bit to think about him but I'm trying to let all of that go and live in the present, which is here in the big city.

I'm currently trying to decide how long I want to be a line cook. I remember the first few weeks of clocking in at work when the computer verified my "job assignment" as line cook, the sense of pride, accomplishment and pride I felt. Now, it's gotten a little stale. I miss the interaction with people. Being a line cook consists of coming into work, doing a ton of prep, cooking all night while getting criticized by the chef and then cleaning up. Go home, do it all over again the next day. I'm questioning if I can really do this long term. I want to find a job that combines cooking with a more laid back atmosphere. Maybe something that combines customer interaction. I've looked at working on some food trucks. I think that would be fun! I don't know. I'm still trying to find a good fit but I do feel that I'm closer to finding that than I have ever been before in my life.